Kylie Minogue NOT pint sized

In an exclusive interview, pint sized pop princess Kylie Minogue has revealed she is NOT pint sized. Furthermore, she has candidly spoke about how she hates people constantly making references to her height.

“Everywhere I flamin’ look, there’s articles written about my height. The flamin’ drongoes should talk about something else other than how tall I am”, the tiny singer said.

She then stunned everyone by claiming she isn’t actually pint sized. “I’m taller than a flamin’ pint!” The petite songstress complained, and to back up her claims pulled out a pint to demonstrate she was in fact taller than it.

kylie pint

THE SHOCKING TRUTH: Kylie standing next to a pint glass, above.

Amazingly, Kylie was at least 2 cm taller than the pint glass. Professor of pint glasses at Newcastle University Jimmy Nail said the picture is not conclusive. “While Kylie looks taller than the pint glass, you have to remember she’s wearing shoes. You would have to take a couple centimetres off for that. Although my estimation is that she she’s probably a tiny bit taller than a pint glass”

Kylie made it clear she was hoping that this evidence will put an end to people constantly talking about her height. “Perhaps now people will stop calling me a flamin’ ‘pint sized pop princess’, I really hate it when they say that all the time.”

The pint sized pop princess then poured some Foster’s lager into the pint glass and started to drink from it through a straw. Then she squeaked that she needed to visit somewhere called ‘The Dunny’, which we assume is one of Australia’s trendy nightclubs. The diminutive star then scurried off as fast as her tiny little legs would carry her.

Titchy Kylie’s husband, Jason Donovan, who famously starred alongside her in ‘Jason and his Amazing Technicolour Underpants’, was unavailable for comment.

Advertisements

Easiest way to get a six pack

This is by far the easiest way to get those six pack abs. Forget sit ups, ab crunches and whatever else you may have heard. All you need is this revolutionary piece of equipment in order to get the abdominal muscles you always dreamed of.

It’s called Fence™.  Here’s how it works:

Image

 

You can get the perfect sixpack in these three easy steps:

1. Erect your new Fence™ system.

2. Take off T-shirt

3. Press your stomach up against Fence™

Order Fence™ today!